Tuesday, October 2, 2012

knitty pants

 Yesterday I caught myself holding back tears while sweeping.  Weird I know. 
 
I was just feeling the loss and a little sting of jealousy of a mother/daughter relationship I wish I had with my mom.  I guess it started yesterday at work when I was talking with a friend that mentioned the magazine her mom gave her because she was done with it.  My friend passed this magazine to me...and I was just a tad sad that my mom couldn't pass along magazines to me.  And I was wishin' I knew my mom at this stage in my life.  And I was wishin' that I could have a friendship with her.  A dangerous road to go down.  Most of the time I've grown to accept this part of my life.  Thankful for what time I did have with her before she died.  And it's been 24 years ago!  And then sometimes it hits me like a brick...while I'm sweeping the floor.  I was trying to get busy doing something to distract that road I was travelin' down of wishin' it was different.  And then I looked up and there stands Donovan who had walked in from work...and I didn't even hear him come in because of the sweeper.  (Good timing God!)  He gave me a hug and we talked. Man I love that guy!  I have so much to be thankful for...and yet the ache in my heart was so heavy. 
 
And then came today.  After a full nights' sleep I was feeling better and had this 180 degree turn around of thankfulness and gratitude.  Thanking God a million times over for this little lady right here.


Isn't she sweet?  A friend from church had asked if Isabella and I would like to go with her and her daughter to a knitting class they were offering at church tonight.
 
NOT IN 1 MILLION years did I think I would ever take a knitting class. 
But they were doing a class for beginners making scarfs. 
Well now you have my attention. I can now complete some pins from pinterest from my "Outfits I Love" board.  Boom.  Winning.
 
And although my friend couldn't make it because of her Grandfathers death~(So sorry for you Sarah!)
Isabella and I still went to pick out some yarn at Hobby Lobby and we went. 

 And I just had to thank God over and over for this little sweet pre-teen of mine.  She has a great, sassy, little, fun, sarcastic way about her. And I have no idea where she get's that from??  
 She's a hoot.  She had me laughing till my cheeks hurt with little lines like, "Well aren't you a little, fast, knitty pants?"  Is knitty even a word?
 Well anyways....Yep! You gotta know she was jealous of my beginning knitting skills.
What a turn around the last 24 hours has been.  Emotional? Yes! Thankful? Yes!  Grateful? Yes! 
 
Still wishin' I could borrow a magazine from my mom....but thankful for the promise that someday I'll see her again and so very, very thankful for the chance to have a mother/daughter relationship with 2 of the sweetest girls I could ever ask for.  I love you Isabella Rose & Suzanna Faye. 

2 comments:

Cottonista said...

So sweet, Heather.

Jewel said...

Love this post, knitty pants! I like that word "knitty!"